Khia - My Neck, My Back

* (out of four)

I moved to the Tampa Bay area a year ago, and one of my main hopes and prayers was that none of the local women looked like this crack-toothed hoochie, a born and bred Tampa native.

Needless to say, when I arrived in Tampa, I was sorely disappointed and realized why this area ranks so low on Forbes.com top cities for singles (#36 out of 40!). To add more pain, I live near St. Petersburg, the more geriatric side of the bay, so it's been many lonely nights with those five girls from Palm Street.

Anyway, the "My Neck, My Back" video shows Khia at a neighborhood park barbeque with all the other local chickenheads and thugs. Khia spits out profound lyrics such as, "Lick it now, lick it good / Suck this pussy just like you should / My neck, my back / lick my pussy and my crack."

The video looks as if it was shot with a handheld camera, and the beat sounds like it was background music in a porno, programmed from a Casio keyboard. This was the peak of the local hip-hop scene a few years back, and if that was the peak, I don't want to hear the bottom of the barrel.

-Guest Reviewer Leon Bracey